time span 5mins.
Sam: Now let’s check with Trina on the war coverage in Liberia
Sarah: Trina, how’s the status on the war?
A shot of an (ID pic of Trina(or whoever) preferably a funny UVA one or a
Driver’s License) is being used.
Trina: Thank you Sara, the war in Liberia is still deep neck in …(she’s
cut off and you hear instead, women and children screaming, things breaking,
gun shots, bombs, wailing, for about 2-3 mins? Then static at the end.
Back to Sara and Sam:
Sara: eh…Sounds like Trina is having a hoot of a time over there.
Sam: Nevermind that, where’s my coffee?
Weather Forecast 1
(I wouldn’t mind if this is like an ongoing joke throughout the news,
because they always check back with the weather a couple times in the morning)
Sara: Let’s hear from Jim Thorpe on our forecast for today, Jim?
Jim: (He just looks at the camera and opens the door showing outside for 15
seconds, gestures to the open door, voila, then shuts the door. Camera pans
back to Sara and Sam)
Weather Forecast 2
Sam: And now with Jim Thorpe with an update on today’s forecast
Camera pans to Jim
Jim: ( opens the door and shows outside again 10 secs and closes it. Camera
back to Sara and Sam)
Weather Forecast 3
Sara: Let’s check again with Jim Thorpe with today’s weather,
looks like a beautiful day right Jim?
Jim: (takes a swing of a 40oz malt liquor in a brown paper bag, and swaggers
to the door opens it for 5 secs and then shuts it, then lets out a huge belch)
Camera back to Sara . (maybe after this Sara and Sam goes into a belching
contest of their own, of course Jim Thorpe wins)
Sara: Nice one Jim. I bet I could top that sucker. Belch~!
Sam : nah, check this out – belch~!
Sara: Burp~!
Sam:Burp~!
Sara :burp~!
Sam:BELCH~!
Camera shot of Jim Thorpe who has the loudest one.
Jim: BRAAAAAAAAAAAP~!!!
Camera back to Sara and Sam.
Sara: Hey I think we have a winner.
Sam: (Looks around him) Where’s my coffee?
Weather Forecast 4
Sam: Now one last update on the weather
Camera to Jim Thorpe whose passed out on the floor in front of the door with
his 40oz in his hand.
Sports (bra)
Sam G: In the championship diving match held for the local
triple A school district it appears a teen lost her top
after diving her final dive in the competition. After the
dive, the teen?s bikini top made it to the water surface
before she did. The apparent cause of the top lost was
said to be because it was filled with insulation to make
the teen?s breast appear larger then they actually were.
Aside from a laughing crowd and embarrassment, the teen
is fine and plans to be back in the pool soon with no more
added additions.
McDonald 911
Sam P. The Charlottesville police answer hundreds of emergency calls daily
from citizens but dispatcher Deni Stempowski says a call from a McDonald’s
is super sized silliness. (Reporter) is live at the scene, (Reporter)?
Switch to shot of reporter standing outside of McDonalds.
Reporter Thanks Bill, I’m standing here at the Barracks Road McDonald’s
in Charlottesville where earlier today a caller placed a rather peculiar emergency
call. The caller is customer Lula Brown, who asked for barbecue sauce with
her order.
Zoom out to reveal Lula Brown standing next to the reporter.
caption “asked for BBQ sauce with her order”
Reporter Lula, what happened here today?
Lula Brown I spent almost $10 on food and I wanted some sauce, I was told
I would have to pay extra for sauce. It’s not a store policy. It’s
not in writing and I don’t feel I should pay extra for any sauce unless
it is store policy and they show it to me.
Back to reporter
Reporter As ridiculous as it might seem, Charlottesville police did respond,
they sent an officer in a patrol car to help solve this condiment caper. When
the officer arrived he found Ms. Brown engaged in a screaming match with McDonald’s
employee Ed Thomas.
Ed, when did you learn that Ms. Brown was dissatisfied with your condiment
policy?
Reveal Ed, a McDonald’s employee standing with the reporter with caption
“No Nuggets, No Sauce”
Ed Thomas Well our store policy is ‘No Nuggets, No Sauce’ and
since Ms. Brown didn’t buy any of our new all white-meat chicken nuggets
I told her that I would have to charge her for barbeque sauce. At that point
she refused to move her vehicle from the drive thru window and I knew we had
a problem on our hands.
Reporter How long did Ms Brown stay parked at the window?
Ed Thomas About 10 minutes, long enough to slow down our whole operation.
We had a lot of dissatisfied customers.
Reporter Indeed, we have one of those customers standing by, Joe Schmoo was
actually in line behind Lula Brown. He witnessed all of the action first hand.
Joe, what did you see and how long did it take you to get your food?
Show Joe Schmoo with caption “took him 15 minutes to get his food”
Joe Schmoo Well I saw Ms. Brown get her food and then she just didn’t
move her car. It took me 15 minutes to get my food.
Reporter Quite a bit of confusion all over a little barbeque sauce. (Hold
up a pack of sauce) The police weren’t able to help Lula get her sauce
but they were able to restore a bit of order to the scene of this drive thru
debacle. The Charlottesville McDonald’s still offers a wide assortment
of condiments for free. After this episode though, the cost of extra sauce
is clearly posted.
Show Ed Thomas with a sign that reads “Extra Sauce $.10”
Back to the Reporter who hands Lula the bbq sauce that he/she was holding
Reporter (Reporter) Back to you guys in the studio.
Bill Thanks, (Reporter). Lula Brown could’ve ended up paying more than
the cost of extra sauce. We remind our viewers that pranks and unnecessary
calls to 9-1-1 can be considered a crime.
Burglary in C-ville
Sarah: In local news, a man in Charlottesville, VA has broken into several
houses and apartments. His most recent break-in was last night around 3AM,
in the Oxford Hill apartment complex on Madison Avenue.
Sam P.: It is reported that after punching a young woman who lives there in
the face, he ran away when she kicked him in the chest. There were no witnesses,
however the young woman promptly called the police from the safety of a neighboring
apartment.
Sarah: The Albemarle County police are unclear as to how the suspect actually
got into the apartment as the front door was locked when the young woman left
around 11PM, but was unlocked when she returned home. The balcony door was
also open when she returned.
Sam P.: We believe the burglar was in the midst of stealing the young woman’s
possessions when she arrived home unexpectedly. Fortunately, the only items
missing were a low-quality DVD player with its connector cords missing, and
a couple of Disney movies on VHS.
Sarah: Good thing the woman came home when she did…
Sam P.: Why would he steal a DVD player without the cords? And why would he
steal The Jungle Book on VHS instead of some DVDs he could play in the DVD
player? Well, I guess without the cords he couldn’t use the DVD player
anyway….
Sarah & Sam P.: HAHAHAHA
Sarah: It’ll make it harder for him to sell that DVD player on Ebay.
Serves him right….
Sarah & Sam P.: HAHAHAHA
Sarah: The police have already taken steps toward catching the suspect. Earlier
this morning, they visited the young woman at her apartment and used toxic
volcanic ash to dust for fingerprints. We are told that they covered the whole
apartment with this ash so that they would not miss anything. Their forensics
team is working hard to find the culprit now.
Sam P.: There are no leads as of yet, but they tell us that the suspect is
an adult male with average height and average build, with indistinguishably
colored hair and eyes. Please be on the lookout if you see a man that fits
this description and please lock your doors at night.
New Drug
[We see our two tv anchors sitting at their desk and they make a transition
to the medical news. The medical news is given in the same fashion as a cheesy
TV infomercial. Sarah will act as the medical expert (the guy trying to sell
his product) as the assistant who offers nothing more than over enthusiastic
remarks and expressions.]
Sarah: Wow, something smells good in the studio today.
Sam: Why yes Sarah. I believe that’s because our medical expert _____
is here and cooking up some medical marvel in the kitchen!
[Sarah walks over to the kitchen studio where the medical expert is, dressed
as a cheesy infomercial man wearing an apron standing behind a counter.]
Medical expert: Thanks Sam! That’s right folks! I have here in my hand
a drug like no other. I guarantee you that once you buy this product you’ll
never fuss with ordinary drugs again!
Sarah: Well I dunno ___. What’s so special about this drug? I’ve
bought drugs on TV before and they’ve all been a disappointment.
Medical Expert: It’s a new drug called X. It’s been developed
over the years but it’s only been recently approved by the FDA. It’s
new and improved and can cut your ailments in half. See the secret here is
to add X to anything your mom told you not to eat or drink. Wanna put it in
soda? Ok! It’s actually been semi-proven that the caffeine reacts with
our lil drug wonder here to make it bigger, faster and better! Wanna put it
in candy? Sure! Hey Sarah where’s the drug? This method is a favorite
for all the kiddies.
[During all of this the medical expert hastily puts the drug into various
forms of food. Nothing looks very appetizing but Sarah and the audience oh
and ah over it]
Sarah: that’s unbelievable ___
Medical expert: that’s right sarah. You never have to fuss with ordinary
pills ever again. AND you never have to worry about the dosage. Want some
pills for breakfast? Go ahead! Lunch? Dinner? No problem. X makes the perfect
snack on the go. The uses are endless.
Sarah: Well, I think I’m sold! What do you think audience?
[shows audience clapping and cheering]
Sarah: I think we’re all sold. But I’m curious, how much is X?
is this going to cost me an arm and a leg to buy?
Medical expert: see that’s the beauty of it. If you call right the studio
right now, you can get your very first bottle of X for the low price of only
$19.99. AND if you call within the next 15 minutes you’ll receive a
2nd bottle absolutely free! So don’t delay. Call our toll free number
now!
Sports – multi-million dollar
Sam G. It's not often that you hear of women in sports
signing multi-million dollar contracts. This, however, has
not been the case in the recruitment of skilled field
hockey women for the recently formed Women's Profesional
Field Hockey League (WPFHL) We have begun to see
negotiations for the women considering signing with the
league similar to that of players of the NBA and NFL. Just
this afternoon, Martha Sikes, an All-American from
Burmingham College signed with the league for $12.5 mil.
over the course of three years. The formation of the league
is hoping to make the U.S. more competative as a country in
international competition.
(I thought that this could be said while a picture of so
called Martha Sikes is displayed in the right hand corner
of the screen)
Sam G. Another breaking event in sports today came in the
croquet finalsin Florence South Carolina between returning
champ Kit Wilkins and up and coming start Ace Fink. Wilkins
was apparently even more unwilling to give up his reign as
croquet champ that anyone realized. When the manager of the
tournament tried to give Fink the first place trophy,
Wilkins grabbed the trophy, hit Fink over the head with it
and took off running. Wilkins is currently being detained
by Florence Police. Fink suffered a minor concussion as
well as facial lacerations. He has not yet commented as to
whether or not he will press charges.
(I though this story as well could be told as a picture of
some part of the event is displayed in the right hand
corner of the screen.)
Commercials
Acmewrap Brand House Sealant
Characters: None
Setting: Night, a single house surrounded by fields.
[Low camera stalking house through grass, music from ‘Signs’]
Announcer: “You can lock your doors. You can close your windows. They
will still invade your house by the millions.”
[Cut to child sleeping, camera stalks menacingly towards child’s face,
then zooms suddenly in on nostrils]
Announcer: “Allergens are everywhere, all the time, waiting to sicken
you and your family. It only takes the tiniest crack or imperfection in your
structure for your whole household to be in danger.”
[Morning- children happily jumping onto parents bed, happy music plays]
Announcer: “That’s why there’s Acmewrap-”
[Dad stretches and opens blinds to reveal windows covered with plastic wrap]
Announcer: “The only defense your house needs against a world of dangerous
airborne illnesses waiting to happen. See your local hardware store about
Acmewrap, it’s cheaper than you think. Mention this add and get free
installation of Acmewrap with purchase of the total household protection plan.”
[Smiling worker in hardhat carefully applies plastic wrap to windows, cut
to house at sunset]
Announcer: “Why try to cheat death one more day when an allergen free
life is waiting for you? Acmewrap- now you can breathe again.”Erectasure
Brand Posture Augmenter
[Smiling worker in hardhat carefully applies plastic wrap to windows, cut
to house at sunset]
Characters: Celebrity, Trophy Wife
Setting: yellow filtered warm and fuzzy park
[camera tracks celeb as he walks to bench and sits]
Celeb: “Hi I’m Larry Sabato. You may not have known this but I
used to have incredibly poor posture. It was so bad I was constantly afraid
to urinate without help for fear of wetting myself.”
[camera cuts wide to catch trophy entering]
Trophy: “He’s not joking. He was terrified of public bathrooms.
Not to mention the nightmares we had at home. It was so hard finding furniture
that worked for us.”
Celeb: “But then I discovered Erectasure- it changed my life.”
Trophy: “Changed our lives.”
[camera cuts wide to show people jogging, enjoying park]
Announcer: “Erectasure is a clinically tested daily pill to help people
with bad posture. While the clinical tests were hardly conclusive, we’re
almost certain you’ll feel you need this product. In fact the placebo
results are so good, we’re willing to offer you a trial dosage- then
if you can guess whether or not it’s a sugar pill its on us.“
Celeb& Trophy: “Thanks Erectasure. Now we can focus on living again.”STD
Commercial
Girls in bathing suits running on a beach. They pass the camera and the screen
goes black:
VOICE OVER: If you have herpes – then you can’t do this!
(TITLE SCREEN ACCOMPANIES WITH THE FOLLOWING)
Brought to you by Bush’s STD Security Commission.
Keeping you clear of the herpmiester for a happier life!
MealaVities
Do you not have enough time to eat every meal of the day?
- asked to a very large man/woman nodding head
Do you not have the money or time to prepare every meal of the day?
- asked to a poor person and a very busy mom in split screen nodding heads
Are you looking for the convenience of being able to eat on the run with out
cramping?
- asked to a sports person doing their sport nodding head
Do you hate the full feeling after eating a meal?
- asked to an obviously anorexic or bulimic girl nodding head
Then MealaVities are for you! The new meal in a pill! Healthy, safe, quick,
and convenient! Nothing better, Nothing less!Depression Study
(mix between the depression commercials and a star search commercial)
Are you depressed? Do you feel that you don’t have anyone to talk to?
Is it that you don’t fit in or that you’re neglected by your loved
ones? Are you constantly piked on or extremely self conscious? Are you suicidal?
GIVE US A CALL! YOU COULD EARN UP TO $2,500 FOR OUR 18 DAY STUDY. Participants
must have at least a 4 month history of these symptoms to be considered.Car
Commercial
Shot of an apple, a knife flies down from the top of the screen and cuts the
apple in half.
Shot of an orange, a cinder block drops from the top of the screen and smashes
the orange.
Shot of grapes, a gust of wind and water (from a hose off-screen) shoots them
out of the frame.
Shot of a metal block, knife comes down from top of the screen – hits
the block and snaps in half. Cinder block dropped from above top of frame
and shatters when it hits the metal block. Water does absolutely nothing as
it’s sprayed onto the block.
VOICE OVER - Yeah, it’s kind of like that. (cut to shot of car) The
new 2004 Dodge Ram (enter name of random car well do this with here)!Benefit
Concert
VOICE OVER (with visual text on screen like all the concert title screens
have in commercials)-
Meat Loaf Benefit Concert! October 20th, 2003!
Help Meat Loaf fundraise at the Nissan Pavillion…. In the back right
parking lot!
Tickets are for a donation of $40 or more!
(Last second, spoken very quickly) all proceeds go directly towards Meat Loaf’s
bankruptcy.
Sports – running women
Sam P or Sara
Ever wonder about what it’s like to run for miles on end? Well, Brian
Justice reports on the Holy Mother’s Cross Country team.
V.O.
Most people run to exercise. But for the women at the campus of Holy Mother’s
College, they run for something more.
Mary
There’s something about running for your school. It really makes you
reach for those last few steps over the finish line.
V.O.
This is Mary, she is a junior. She has been running for almost her whole life.
Mary
I don’t know, my dad says that I’ve been running since I was very
young.
V.O.
There are many women who have stories like Mary.
Jessica
Hi, I’m Jessica and I’m 20 years old. I’m a sophomore. I
really enjoy running, because, like, just because I enjoy the exercise.
Elizabeth
Yeah, it’s like totally refreshing to come home after a heavy session
and take a shower.
Huh? Oh, I’m Elizabeth.
V.O.
The girls practice everyday, sometimes on Saturdays and Sundays.
Mary
Yeah the Worst Part is coming for a Saturday practice.
V.O.
This week the girls are looking forward to a meet against their rival school
Sacred Heart.
Jessica + Elizabeth
Yeah, we’re excited about the meet!
V.O.
This is Brian Justice, reporting for KRP News.Lin Qiu
Kama Sutra
33 Cent Positions
( Intro of music with words saying now for your local news. Sara and Sam looking
very serious as sexual animations flash on the screens behind them. Corner
box displays the cellular phone with triple X’s dislayed on the screen
and 33cents.)
(obviously reading from a screen in front of them not looking into the camera)
Sara: Latin Lovers have spread their knowledge and experience to help lovers
everywhere. The cellular phone company that started out in Brazil, YES, has
been providing inspiration to lovers lacking creativity in their private lives.
By offering a series of animations of sexual positions downloadable to cellular
phones YES has been able spread their services throughout the world. For 33
cents couples in need of inspiration can download one of 40 different animations
based on Karma Sutra to their cellular phones along with an explanation and
the degree of difficulty. This service has been very successful in Europe.
As demand increases YES hopes to double the number of animations available.
(eagerly)
Sam: Can anyone download this material?
(matter of factly)
Sara: Yes, any individual can access these images by dialing * YES on their
cellular phones. Keep in mind that you must have a cell phone compatible for
downloading these images. Each image comes with a warning statement expressing
that the content of these images is meant for people 18 years of age and older.
Sam: I think we ought to invest in YES stock along with the cellular phone
companies such as Nokia that allow these helpful images to be downloaded.
I can only imagine the games that can be played with a tool like this. In
my day it was spin the bottle to kiss someone, now it will be spin the bottle
and get into the downloaded position.
Sara: Parents talk to your kids about safe sex.
CHICKEN WING FESTIVAL
Sam P: If you are looking for something to do this weekend the 4th annual
Chicken Wing Festival started today in Charlottesville.
Sara: That’s right Sam, if you are looking for good food, fun and games
head down to McIntire Park for festivities, our local correspondent has more…
Correspondent: Thanks Sara, I’m standing on the exact spot where just
half an hour ago 22-year-old Joe Shmoe captured the Chicken Wing Champion
by eating 94 chicken wings in 12 minutes. He was battling 23-year-old John
Doe, the defending chicken wing champion. It came down the wire but Mr. Shmoe
managed to beat his component by one chicken wing at the last second. The
rivalry between the two was rumored to be so huge that police were standing
by in case a riot was to break out. Luckily nothing more than a few chicken
wings were thrown around the crowd, as you can see by the footage. The mood
is overall cheerful, as members of the community were united by the event.
Witness: Even though some food was thrown about, it was for a good cause.
The festival is good because it gathers the community together to enjoy the
wonders of fine chicken and the two best chicken eaters in the county. We
are proud and honored that Charlottesville has two of the best chicken wing
competitors in the country. Way to go Joe and John!
Correspondent: Joe and John will both move on to the Va level chicken wing
competition in Richmond next month. From McIntire Park, I’m (enter name)
reporting, back to you Sara.
Sara: Other activities at the fair include wing bobbing and a competition
for the best wing sauce. What a heart-warming story!
COFFEE ALERT
-News intro and news flash-
Sara We start tonight’s news cast with breaking news: the terror alert
level has changed from the peaceful, utopian level green to a perilous level
red!
Sam P. That’s right viewers, we are at full terror alert. Apparently
the Terrorist got onto the plane without any difficulty despite the new security
measures already in place at airports across the nation, and, at some point,
got out of his seat and tampered with beverages for the flight. The Terrorist
removed both pots of decaf coffee and regular coffee from their designated
“DECAF” and “REGULAR” hot plates, and switched them.
For the terrorist’s blatant disregard for the rules and printed coffee
labels, this individual has been deemed a threat to the peace and freedom
of Americans everywhere and has been labeled “The Coffee Terrorist.”
Sara Although there were no fatalities or injuries as a result of this latest
attack on American liberty, we are reporting this story anyway. I mean, there
were still victims. Victims… yes. Nearly half a dozen people aboard
flight 1701 asked the perky Hooters Air flight attendant for Decaf and were
served Regular coffee. As I said there were no injuries, but victims who consumed
the Terrorized coffee were irritated by their inability to fall asleep on
the flight, and remained alert, attentive, and fidgety for the duration of
the 3 hour ordeal. These passengers were forced into activities such as listening
to music, looking out the window, and reading those crappy magazines they
always have on planes.
-Shift to different camera-
Sara Tonight we bring you to ground zero of the attacks, the airport where
the DC-10 owned and operated by the newly christened Hooters Air landed. We
have a correspondent live on the spot via satellite. [split screen or switch
to correspondent outside an airport with LIVE VIA SATTELITE written somewhere
conspicuously] Correspondent, how is the situation there?
Crspndt Sara, I’m here at the airport, where not long ago, Terrorized
flight 1701 touched down. Passengers exiting the plane did not show any outward
signs of trauma caused by the Terrorization they experienced, which leads
us to believe that this was more of a psychological Terror experiment, testing
our strengths and weaknesses. Flags flew at full mast, but we expect that
to change any moment now, though we have absolutely no evidence to support
that.
Sara Correspondent, what increased security measures do Hooters Air and other
airlines plan on implementing to protect against this obvious vulnerability?
Crspndt Officials from other airlines could not be reached for comment, although
Hooters Air plans on having flight attendants test the pot with caffeine sensitive
litmus-type paper to check the caffeine level before pouring each cup of coffee.
Sara So there’s no way to prevent the actual coffee pot switch Terror-Attack
from happening, is there?
Crspndt No Sara, not to my knowledge. However I do have someone here who might
be able to answer that question better. [camera pans out to show busty girl
in Hooters T-shirt standing smiling bubbly by correspondent] The flight attendant
to my left here was the very one who poured the Terrorized coffee. Tracy,
can you tell us what happened on flight 1701?
Tracy Yeah, like, someone totally switched the coffee pots around.
Crspndt Were the passengers traumatized when they realized the unthinkable
had happened?
Tracy No, you know, they were mad at me, cuz they thought I mixed them up.
That’s so not something I would do. I take pride in my work [bounces
for camera].
Crspndt Are there any preventative measures being taken to prevent this heinous
act from being repeated?
Tracy Uhhhh….I don’t think so? Yeah, I don’t know.
Crspndt Thank you very much for your time Tracy. Sara, Sam….we’ll
keep you updated as events continue to unfold. Back to you in the studio.
Sam P. Thanks Correspondent. [change camera angle] We have in our studio Coffee
expert and author of Coffee Terrorism: Could it Happen to You?, Bogdan (you
think of a different name, im too lazy and its gonna be bogdan). Welcome to
the program.
Bogdan Thanks for having me, Sam.
Sam P. Bogdan, could you tell us please what the premise of your book is?
Bogdan What my book is saying is we had warning signs for this whole Coffee
Terrorism thing YEARS ago. It clearly points out the precursors and the problem
itself, and even offers some solutions.
Sam P. What advice would you have to victims of flight 1701?
Bogdan Buy my book.
Sam P. Good advice. But why should they listen to you?
Bogdan Because, Sam. I am from Russia, and all Russians are serious. Also,
I have a funny accent, so naturally anything I say should be taken as truth.
Sam P. You’re right. So why did this atrocious event happen?
Bogdan Flight 1701 happened because America is a dependent nation. What is
the first thing most Americans do when they get up in the morning? They brew
a fresh pot of coffee! Coffee Sam, Coffee! The Terrorists know that without
a fresh supply of coffee, we are likely to suffer intense caffeine withdrawals.
Millions of men and women would not be able to function at work properly,
resulting in an inefficient workforce which would in turn cause another recession.
This recession would result in, if I haven’t made it clear enough for
you, World War III. The Terrorists know this. The Coffee Terrorist knows this.
This new act of terror shows us how well they know the American psyche, and
flight 1701 is exactly how they learn about us.
Sam P. With an accent like that, there’s no way you can be wrong.
Bogdan I know.
Sam P. Any closing thoughts?
Bogdan Buy my book.
Sam P. Thanks for being with us this evening.
Bogdan Thank you. Buy my book.
Sara Much evidence has come to light in this case, and News Channel 7 has
been compiling all the data for you, the viewer. Our team of investigators
has been working on this story since it came in, and already our experts have
put together a re-enactment of how they think the Coffee Terrorist pulled
off this shameless Act of Terror. Before we continue with the footage, we
should warn you: the images you are about to see may put you in a state of
“shock and awe.” Viewer discretion is advised.
-Clip to scene with RE-ENACTMENT written in bold across the bottom. Scene
depicts shadowy character switching coffee pots. Boring ass shit-
[cut back to Sara and Sam P. as clip ends, Sara is shaking her head in disbelief,
Sam P. with forehead in palm, elbow on table, looking down]
Sam P. [wearily] Oh…the Humanity….
Sara [shocked] That…sick…bastard.
[anchors look up to camera suddenly, regain composure]
Sara [said with all seriousness, not a trace of previous shock] Are you at
risk? Are you in danger of being a terror victim at this very moment? [Looks
left warily, looks right warily, looks back at the camera]…well, stay
tuned and find out later in the news cast!
--END OF SCENE--